3 weeks more

This is a difficult moment 4 me & hubby...for the past 3+ months we've been separated miles apart...i thot i'd eventually get used2it but i still find myself crying every day wenever i think of my hubby..i miss him so much...& it hurts to see him being 'punished' for something that he doesn't deserve...it's gonna be 3 more weeks now...im counting down the days dat we would be re-united again..may Allah give us both strength to overcome His challenge...its a tough challenge but it makes our love stronger...every moment together is a joy..to my dearest hubby, sabar aite sayang...juz 3 more weeks of this torture...i'll be waiting4u 2 join me here :)

Convocation

I've been wanting to post this for some time but I haven't been able to get proper internet connection. What I'm blogging may even be outdated by now.

10th October 2009, was convocation day for my wife and all my other batchmates....except me (and Ruzain). It was supposed to be a joyous day. A day of celebration. But in the days leading up to Convocation day, I could not help myself from feeling isolated. I felt increasingly depressed. And on the day itself, I felt like crying. I was sitting up there in the hall when everyone else was lining up to get the scroll. I shouldn't be up there. I should be with my batchmates, having fun, enjoying the company. I was so caught up with my emotions that I didn't get my wife any flowers. I broke my own principles that day...share your happiness with everyone, but not sadness. I unhappy person should not make everyone else sad. It was a bad day for me. The romantic guy and fun side of me was not there.

I spent every ounce of effort in me to smile that day. Try to be happy for others. I think I managed to pull it off...fake my happiness to everyone else. But deep inside it still hurts. The fact that I didn't get any flowers for my wife still haunts me now. Some people might say that I should take this as a motivation for me to do better. But I don't really care much. Right now, I don't even feel like going to my convocation. There's nothing to celebrate, only nightmares to forget.

I have another 4 weeks to go for my professional. I try to study, but I feel like a zombie. I don't feel anything. I just hope what I study stays in my head. My goal is just to get out of here. Hopefully by 20th November 2009, I can leave this place. Move on with my life. Its been a dark episode. I can only wish it will make me stronger. Thanks to everyone who supported me through all this. A proper appreciation speech is due after everything is over. I don't want to keep my hopes up.

Hari Raya Part 3

Everyone woke up early for Hari Raya, although I could make do with a little more sleep. The long drive the previous day didn't wear off. It would be disastrous to wake up late as my mum would scold me. Since this is the first Raya as a married man, I had to wake up early. No more 'Mama's baby boy'. I had to be THE MAN OF THE HOUSE...at least part of THE MEN. Learning from past mistakes of getting scolded for not getting ready early, I think I did well this year. I had my wife to thank for ironing my clothes, doing my hair etc.

Solat Sunat Aidilfitri at Masjid Sungai Rokam started at 8.30 a.m. Alhamdullillah this year my mum was fit enough to go to the mosque. I had my wife to watch over her in case any thing happens. I didn't get to hear alot of the khutbah though as I slipped in and out of conciuosness. After solat, the family gathered for 'salam-salam' session. No tears this year...(not sure if its a good thing or bad thing). The open house proceeded as usual. This year's specialty is bihun sup. Very nice. I lost count of how many servings I had (which results in my less then fit apperance). Unfortunately neither my wife nor myself had any hand in making the great bihun sup.

My wife and I didn't get to go anywhere that day. We were stuck at home attending to guests. My in laws did get to come for the open house in the evening. I was surprised by how my niece and nephews got along really well with my sister in laws. But they did get confused a little...am I Paksu Fir or Abang Firdaus?

Later that night it we headed back to Kuala Kangsar. Since its Raya and all the syaitan dah lepas ikatan, we used the highway (too many ghost stories for my comfort). We arrived around 11 p.m....at the toll booth. For the next 1/2 hour we got lost trying to find the junction to Atok's house. We only found our way after calling my dad in law.

The night didn't end there. Upon arrival we noticed all the aunts and uncles (almost all) were gathering at the veranda with the teenagers. There was a 'brainwashing' session to knock some sense into the youngsters. My wife and I wasn't obligated to attend coz we were considered as the 'successful' ones. But we joined in anyway. The brainwashing was mainly on having ambition and importance of education. It lasted late into the night, around 2 a.m. I managed to contribute some input by sharing my experience of failing. FAILURE IS NOT THE END OF THINGS.

Second Raya was spent mainly at home. I spent my time there adjusting to the family. The kids were dealt with easily (I might be the best 'Abang' around) but theres still lots of work with the elders. Towards the afternoon we went to visit some relatives around Kuala Kangsar...Laksa Kuala Kangsar was the order of the day, and they were really good. Just look at my wife's pics (macam hamster :P ).

By Maghrib we were on the way back to Ipoh. We dropped by to Secret Recipe to get a surprise cake for my parents. As an appreciation for their never ending support of my wife and I.

Third Raya was balik kampung day. Usually its 2nd Raya but this year my family rescheduled because of weddings that needs to be attended. My wife was looking as hot as ever but my shirt seems a bit tighter than normal (the jeans too)...My postulation: a)the shirt shrunk b)my muscles are bigger c)adipose tissue (highly unlikely)...a) is the best answer I think.

That was OUR Raya in a nutshell. Just a few days but it was full of good times. Something that my wife and I will remember for the rest of our lives :)